Pamela Arnold Udoka, a clinical psychologist and author, The Pleasure Manual, has said that the book aimed to address conservative views about seeking therapy for marital challenges among couples.
The Pleasure Manual is a 92-page book written in five chapters, with the foreword written by Funke Felix-Adejumo, an ordained bishop with Agape Christian Ministries, Akure, Ondo State, and reviewed by Reuben Abati.
“I had a need I needed to fulfil. So, what I wanted to do was get people to shift from that mindset of having, or thinking about sex as a taboo, as a mysterious subject, into something that we should acknowledge, that we all do this thing,” she said at the recent book launch and birthday celebration of her husband, Arnold Udoka tagged ‘double celebration’ held in Lagos.
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According to her, the book is meant for mature individuals and couples ready to redefine their intimate life. She also disclosed that the emerging trend now is that many women are developing sexual pain, mostly because they do not know how to engage.
“But if they understand how to relax, how to talk, how to go through therapy, then they can overcome certain things that we have been living with ignorantly, not knowing where to go. But I’m here to say there is healing for all these issues that we go through while we navigate sexual intercourse,” Udoka said.
The clinical psychologist and founder of the Family Wellness Awareness Centre in Lekki said that between August 2023 and July 2025, tracked inquiries at the centre indicated that about 41 percent of clients requested sex therapy services, while 16.9 percent requested marital conflict resolution services. “That means almost six out of ten clients were seeking help for intimacy and relationships,” she said.
According to her, many couples do not have the right information on how to engage their partner, which is considered one of the key challenges for couples.
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She said, “The men do not know how to do proper foreplay.”
“That’s one of the chapters I talked about, touching her or touching him like a pro. If you don’t know how to touch a woman, you don’t know how to touch a man, you cannot arouse a person, because the sexual response cycle is in phases,” she said.
Reuben Abati, host of the morning show on ARISE TV, and book reviewer, described the book as a deeply human and expertly crafted work on sexual intimacy. According to him, the author’s book provided a master class on the art of sexual intimacy.
“The text deliberately emphasises the phrase ‘consenting hours’, which is a tantalising term in itself. It remains to be seen how this book, upon its appearance on bookshelves, can be kept out of the reach of inquisitive adolescents, who, these days, seem more active in the world of sexual intimacy than their grandparents ever were.”
