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There’s that saying that “romance without finance is a nuisance.” Ever heard that phrase?
It’s Valentine’s Week, which is a good time to discuss finance and romance.
Statistics show that one of the main reasons for marital conflict and divorce is money. Actually, financial stress is now frequently cited as the leading reason for divorce. Finances could be a big source of stress for young couples and equally older couples, in addition to the typical bonding and acclimation challenges they face.
Here are seven money tips to help you live a happy financial-romantic life.
1. Discuss Your Finances and communicate effectively
Discuss your financial goals and values from time to time, as having an open and honest conversation about your financial goals, values, and concerns can help establish trust and understanding between you and your partner.
It is best to talk about money matters when dating. They say that love is blind, but marriage will open your eyes to a whole range of other things, including money. Learn more about your partner’s financial habits. Does he or she focus more on investing, saving money, or acquiring stuff? In any case, it’s not a negative thing to like spending money or acquiring possessions; it will only assist you in anticipating what you might occasionally observe in your marriage. Discuss in depth your short- and long-term financial goals and address all aspects of family finances.
2. Understand each other’s money temperament and values
In addition to our distinct temperaments, which in large part explain why and how we behave, our upbringing also affects how we view money. While a woman may be a natural saver, a man may be a natural spender. The situation might be reversed. Either way, they will occasionally get into arguments over financial matters. Some people are fortunate to have had saver parents who instilled sound financial principles in them at a young age, whereas others may have grown up in a household where both the father and mother were spenders. Regardless of our financial background, each person can learn to make better money decisions.
Each couple should evaluate where they stand in each of the categories below and work on improving themselves.
Questions to ask one another can include:
Money Values: Are you long-term or short-term oriented?
Money Temperament: Are you a consumer or a saver?
Are you thrifty or spendthrift?
Money Knowledge: Are you financially naive or astute?
Money Strategy: Are you deliberate or carefree?
Are you an achiever or a receiver when it comes to money?
Read also: 12 Money Tips for Fathers
3. Set Combined Goals
Set financial objectives. You can cooperate to achieve a similar goal by identifying shared financial objectives, such as paying off debt or saving for a down payment on a house. Be forthcoming with your spending. Describe your spending patterns, including any loans or investments, honestly and openly. This can aid in avoiding miscommunications and financial disputes.
4. Decide whether to have a joint or project account
Think about combining your funds: Depending on your personal preferences and financial objectives, you may decide to merge or keep your finances separate. You may choose to run a joint account or a project account to meet your combined needs as they arise. Joint accounts are good, but they don’t work for every family. Stick to what works, but always plan together. I am not saying not to have joint accounts; what works well is what should be adopted.
5. Allow the best hand to handle the joint finances, where applicable.
Sometimes, the man of the house wants to take the lead on money matters but isn’t even disciplined enough to follow a spending plan or budget. The wife may believe she has the know-how about some things, but every time she is meant to work with a budget, she overspends on other unplanned expenses.
Despite the fact that I am a chartered accountant, I discovered early in our marriage that my spouse was a better money manager than I was. Most of the time, I held myself accountable to him since he had more self-control and I wanted to make decisions that would benefit the whole family. I have over the years done better with my personal and family finances, and the family is better off as a result. It is not necessary for a specific gender to play a specific financial role. Let the better person be in charge of the family finances!
6. Have a family budget
Together, agree on a budget, taking into account both of your incomes and expenses. This can help you prioritise your spending and ensure that you are both on the same page.
A budget is a navigator, like a map for your finances. Individuals should have their personal budgets, and there should be a budget for the entire family. A budget is a life saver; it helps you stay on course. It should be drawn and reviewed as a family, and where children are involved, please bring them along too!
Having a budget is the best place to start. You need to figure out where your single kobo, cent, and pence go. Questions to ask will include: What are the necessary and unnecessary expenses? What do we need as a family per month to avoid financial stress?
It’s not uncommon to see couples witch-hunting themselves and looking out for when the other party drops the ball. Corrections should be made with love and empathy. Everyone stumbles from time to time, especially in financial issues, but make sure you are each other’s greatest cheerleader. Has your wife overspent or overshot the budget? Correct her softly. Wives should not nag their husbands over the same financial issue repeatedly.
7. Learn to trust one another
Be as open and honest as possible about your finances, including your spending habits and any debts or investments. This can help prevent misunderstandings and financial disagreements. In many marriages, one partner is more financially successful than the other. The wife may be a homemaker, and the husband may be struggling with his career. If you and your spouse are both earning good money and doing well career-wise, well done, and keep it up. Discuss external demands on your family’s finances as well and devise a plan for dealing with them. Financial pressures could make us close our eyes to the needs of those around us. There are people who are genuinely in need, and no matter how small it is, they will appreciate your generosity. Couples who give wholeheartedly have joy in spite of their inadequacies. It is such a fulfilling thing to be able to put a smile on people’s faces.
In conclusion, a lot of couples, young ones especially, are under pressure to impress family and friends. Ironically, those whom we seek to impress have had their own humbling moments too, but most people hardly share their struggle stories; they only “flaunt” their success. It’s nice to have the best things in life, but don’t be materialistic, possessive, or feel obligated to keep up with the Joneses.
Live within your financial means, support your spouse at all times, and build a financially formidable future together.
