Dear Non-Political Leader,
This is psychologically distressing. I am sorry you are going through this awful at your office. It sounds like somehow your hostile peer leader is politically astute, and she has bonded with people in power and is hell-bent on edging you out.
You might have had a chance to nip this in the bud back at the beginning, but once someone who values power over everything else has gotten the sense that they can get away with whatever they want, it is hard to roll it back. That doesn’t help because you can’t change the past. But it might help you in the future to never again allow anyone to get away with this kind of bizarre behaviour.
Here is my advice based on the facts you stated in your mail. Candidly, you have a choice on what to do, and I will present you with three options.
1. First, I hope you have been documenting these incidents, but if not, go back and re-create anything you can and start documenting everything now. It is clear to me that your boss and your HR Director have allowed a hostile work environment. I could have asked you to request that your HR Director arrange a mediation meeting and demand that your colleague be present at the meeting.
But it sounds like your HR Director is asleep or just straight-up incompetent. It does appear that you are on your own. Having your bonus deducted because of the actions of another person who didn’t consult with you is grounds alone. That is a critical error on your boss’s part. When compensation is affected, the issue becomes much more accurate and tangible.
It is also pertinent to note that if the company is paying your coach, your coach is obligated to escalate to the HR department your observations about your boss’s abdication of responsibility and the total lack of procedural fairness regarding your bonus. Many coaches are unaware they are not protected by client or professional privilege, and your coach is putting themself at risk.
The fact that neither the coach nor the HR Director has taken any steps to help you is a factor in your favour because it sounds like the people in the organization tasked with maintaining a fair workplace have also abdicated. That is not unusual. It is indicative that you are in a toxic work environment.
Bearing the consequences in mind, if you decide to escalate this issue, find your employment contract and read it carefully. I will advise you to seek legal opinion and find out your rights under the current labour laws and industrial courts
However, I must let you know there is a caveat, and you must be mindful of this. You must be aware that if there were an investigation on this matter, even your own team members might not tell the truth because it would put their jobs at risk.
Read also: How to relate with a politically hostile peer leader at the workplace (1)
This option will be exhausting and expensive, but there is a good chance your organization will settle to make the whole thing go away. Organizations with an old boys’ club mentality tend to do that. It is incredible how many lawsuits such organizations manage to absorb to protect their workplace culture and frustrate any forced change in the system. It is a long shot, but the current legal system may or may not be helpful.
You may seek redress for the creation of a hostile work environment. Bearing the consequences in mind, if you decide to escalate this issue, find your employment contract and read it carefully. I will advise you to seek legal opinion and find out your rights under the current labour laws and industrial courts.
2. Second, you must exit the organization as quickly as possible and urgently. Seek out high-quality executive recruiters and get yourself another job. These days, organizations are desperately searching for highly skilled talent like you, and I don’t think you wouldn’t find something great for yourself.
This doesn’t mean you are admitting defeat because it takes much grace to move on despite the unfairness and injustice you have experienced. It is the most mature thing to do, and it is also the most sensible thing to do because it sounds like you need to protect your psychological wellness and your work relationships.
3. Third, you may endure, get political, and play the game with them. While this isn’t a choice, sadly, many people do it to survive and keep their source of livelihood. Many don’t know that it is a recipe for serious health problems. The toxic combination of responsibility without authority contributes to mental health stress, cardiac events, and degraded immune systems. So as stressful as the other two options may seem, this is the one that could kill you, your esteem, and your career.
You may wonder why I am not asking you to have another meeting with your boss and your colleague to work this out. Their body language speaks volumes, and you already seem to have tried everything. So, it is not worth going that route again. Get out now. With your skills and experience, you will get snapped up immediately. Get out there and get yourself another job.
You won’t regret it. Your confidence has been shaken, but you can get it back. Just let them win and save your sanity. I know they have not been fair to you but remember that your colleague has to wake up daily with herself, a manipulative, power-obsessed, lying cheater. She is sowing the seeds of her own destiny, which won’t go well in the long run.
Harboring resentment is like taking rat poison and waiting for the rat to die. Save your own life and career. You will be so happy you did.
Cheering you on,
Dr. Toye Sobande
