I was daddy’s girl. I make no bones about it. It was the way he looked at me when I passed my Exams, the chocolate box he hands me when he returns from a long journey and his immeasurable joy at my success.
I started using Coco channel and Lanvin, all designer perfumes at age twelve because Mr. Alfred Amodu, my dearest father, would save to buy them in mini bottles for his daughters. My perfume collection was awesome for a 12 year old and has been so ever since.
My appreciation and knowledge of perfumes came from my father who himself was not a perfume person but loved to purchase them for all his daughters. He loved his aftershaves and I knew them well. Brut, Old spice… Today if you walked past me wearing Lanvin, Coco Channel, Trussardi, Poison by Yves St Laurent and Dior (the early ones) I can always tell which one you are wearing.
I was Daddy’s girl but I also understood the ranking for Daddy’s girls. There were six of us girls in my family and my elder sister was number one. She looked like his mother. I did not mind, as long as he loved me and he did.
My relationship with my Dad was very special. I speak pretty much like him, I love travel like him and I look a lot like him. I wonder whether over the years my mother in sharing her love for all her children reserved a special place in my heart for me because I not only looked like her husband but spoke like him.
I also love books .That I also got from my father. I like to write a lot and that I got from him as well.
Before he passed, Mr. Amodu, Public Servant extra –ordinary and Educationist was planning on putting his experience together in a book. But it was not to be. He saw me however prepare my manuscript for my first book but never saw the actual book. Consequently my first book, In the Blink of an Eye published in 2007, was dedicated to my Dad.
It says in the book written immediately after his passing. “This book is dedicated to the memory of my charming father, Mr. Alfred Yenisa Amodu, for love and family, for inspiration and a legacy of justice, for teaching me charity and kindness, and for letting me into his huge library.”
I am the writer I am today because of the opportunities my father gave me, the love he spread in the family and the words he played around with in the house in impeccable English.
No one needs to tell you how much I love my Dad but then I digress.
The relationship between father and daughter has been special since the beginning of time. Mothers often get jealous because fathers show a lot of affection to their daughters. There is usually a silent continuous disagreement between fathers and sons because the sons are drawn to their mothers. “Be a man “my cousin will say to his son whenever he is seen following his mother around. The boy by the way is 7 years old (lol). Men are often jealous of the relationship between their sons and their wives, as we are jealous of the relationship between our husbands and their daughters. Therein lays the core of my piece today.
A father who loves his daughters must not be so in love with them as to ruin them. He must not ostracize his wife while showering his daughters with love and he must not spare the rod and spoil the child. Children are clever and can come between you and your wife. When your wife has scolded your daughter, even if you think it’s unfair or the punishment is too severe for the crime, you must be careful not to say so in front of your daughter.
Most young girls who become unmanageable, who become rude and unable to function in the real world have either had a difficult family background or have been spoilt by their fathers. They are made to believe by their Dads that they can never do wrong. They are so spoilt that they have no respect for constituted authority. Let us love them as much as we can but let us tell them the truth as well. Some times this love for their daughters can affect their relationship with other men. No man is even good enough. So watch out!
I watch my husband today as he shows his daughters a lot of love. On the dance floor, they are a sight for sore eyes. Every move matched by a daughter, every smile by him monitored by another daughter and a spark as a smile is reciprocated. My husband bursts a move to the new sounds of his teenage daughters.” I am looking for my Johnny”, “Aye” and Caro.
It’s a beautiful sight .Happy father’s day to the head of the Abu autonomous community, Mr Thompson Abu, a good father, and to all you wonderful fathers out there.
Eugenia Abu
