I really hope the men will not come after me after I have made “our” secret open. Anyways, it is a thing I love doing, making people know what they do not know, this time, revealing how they reason, probably sharing with the ladies the unsuspicious thought about us. This is my perspective and to a great extent, men will never tell it out.
Do not even think you know how men are wired, but it is a privilege for me, giving the ladies a smooth ride, if you like, call it a tour inside his mind. This tour will give you a clue to minding him.
As a man, I do not think it is out of place seeing a lady going after what she likes or admires, especially if he is worth going for. Now, this is it. In a gathering with my friends at a social outing, I caught one of us staring at a lady, quickly I hit him. When I asked why he was staring, all he got to say was that she was staring at him. One of the ladies with us hit back at him wondering what he meant by a lady staring at him. To her, it was wrong for a lady to stare at a man, since it might make him feel she’s coming for him…and so what?
I feel I need to address this issue and put it straight. We all need to understand that we (men and women) are not wired the same way. Maybe at this instance, she needs to start ‘thinking like a man’, definitely; this will correct her perspective about dating and men.
Men are wired differently, and that is one of the reasons as a lady, you have to position yourself aright. Men love to think of things largely, we are logical. They have no time to think of every little. In fact, little things put them off. If our elbow itches, we scratch it. If we have to clear our nose, we clear it. We don’t wonder why our elbow itches. Men don’t make these things any more complicated than that.
Guys don’t search for the “why” in everything. Men don’t need to find the deeper meaning (or assume there is any deeper meaning) in everything. If a woman’s elbow itches, she wonders “Why does my elbow itch? Did I do something to make my elbow itch? Did I eat something that made my elbow itch?”
Women have to find out the “why” for everything they do and everything that happens to them. “Why does this guy like me? What does this mean?” It doesn’t mean anything!! You have to try to understand the man (and vice versa)
Men have a ‘language’. If you are attracted to a man, smile at him and ‘steal’ a glance but more importantly, speak to the man.
To “speak to the man” means that you need to be obvious — we need you to be obvious. If you’re obvious, we’ll walk over like a puppy dog. We don’t want to sit there, thinking and wondering all night long what your casual two second glance means. We encourage you to smile at us and talk to us.
Men aren’t thinking what you think they are. Stop trying to anticipate a man’s reaction to you based upon how you, as a woman thinks. Women so often assume that men are thinking a certain way about how women behave, and women so often are so wrong! If you look at us, we are not thinking that you’re easy. All we are thinking is that you are looking at us. Really, that’s all! We are, in fact, so glad that you’re being obvious enough for us to get it that we almost want to high-five you!
Men are totally OK with you being obvious. Ladies, if you want to meet good men it’s time to wake up! You also need to change how you interact with men based on this knowledge.
So, start smiling and be obvious. You’ll attract men and with time you can tell good intentions from bad ones and you know when to draw the line.
When was the last time you saw a man to whom you were attracted, and you took a risk by smiling at him and getting him to come over with the powers of your femininity? Or even saying “Hi” to him first? It doesn’t mean you should be loose; it means you should be friendly and have a positive attitude that is endearing.
It’s time to start to change your thinking when interacting with men. Overtime, you can decipher if you want such friendship to continue or not. If a man doesn’t approach you and talk to you and you like him, you can say “hello”. Start taking responsibility for your own dating life, and you’ll see it improve!
GODDEY ODIN
