Sometimes it’s better to address a conflict indirectly. For example, if you’re working in a culture where group harmony is important, you may not be able to confront someone directly about an issue.
And sometimes people are more willing to take feedback from others — either someone more powerful or a close confidant. In these cases, it’s best to get a third party involved. Go to your boss and explain the problem. If a colleague is preventing you from running a successful meeting, your boss can step in and move the conversation along.
Or if you and another team member don’t agree on how to spend your shared budget, you might ask your boss to make the decision.
That way, neither of you loses and you’re just carrying out your manager’s orders. In Western culture this indirect approach might be frowned upon, but in other places it’s more effective for handling disagreement.
(Adapted from the “HBR Guide to Managing Conflict at Work,” by Amy Gallo.)
